Say To You
by crybabies
Summary: He laughs and laughs until he finds his consciousness eluding him, and laughs some more at the prospect of achieving a peaceful slumber, because she is always there in his dreams.


Say To You

By crybabies

A/N: I don't own Naruto.

I was planning on taking a few days break from writing my current story, A Blessing in Disguise, but then I just got this idea for a one shot. I was listening to Say to You by Strfkr and just got inspired to write. Hope you enjoy!

* * *

He reeks of sweat, alcohol, and tears.

There is no rush to return to his one bedroom home, under furnished and uninviting with stark white walls. His body aimlessly wanders through the ice-ridden streets, embracing the fleeting bliss of being as lost as his now dampened rationality. Never mind that frost grows on his limbs or that wetness solidifies on his cheeks; it is unimportant, Kakashi notes, before his thoughts once again recede into the darkened crevices of his mind.

Despite so, his momentary bliss is lost.

Kakashi does not fret because he thinks there is more time, much more time, to drown out his pain with relieving drink. It is the only dependable constant that he has left, the only one that would dare not judge him for his blithering mistakes. Alcohol is the sole supplier of warmth that he can appreciate, now that she is gone.

She is gone, but there is still a ghost that lives in his home. The scent of vanilla and apple lingers in his room, and there is a permanent indent apparent on the dark teal cushions of his couch. Sparse medical texts sit perched on dusty shelves, waiting faithfully for her return. Kakashi wonders if she ever will, as he topples onto worn down pillows.

There are so many touches, so many answers that he wishes he could give to her. That he desperately needs to give to her. He was a fool then, he thinks, and though he is still one now, he believes that he is ready to give himself to her forever. If she would want him.

When he thinks of that day many distant months ago, he feels the wetness once more building in his eyes. It is a stark contrast from then, when hers were wet and glazed with pain and his were dry and blank – when she pleaded to him for those three words, and was left with nothing but silence. Kakashi laughs a bitter, cold laugh as he notes on how the tables have turned. He laughs and laughs until he finds his consciousness eluding him, and laughs some more at the prospect of achieving a peaceful slumber, because she is always there in his dreams.

* * *

He wakes up, but doesn't really wake up because she is standing right there in front of him. There is nothing but a pink towel wrapped around her shapely form, and she is grinning – grinning at him – as she closes in on him on the bed, hips sashaying with her every move. He feels his body jolt with shock and relief and welcomes her home with his arms wide open, murmuring to her how much he's missed her like a broken record player as he strokes her hair with love in his touch.

But when he looks down there is nothing but decaying flesh in his arms; she is dead though still oddly smiling and he can't help but feel the sheer numbness spreading through his entire being,

* * *

The world pits and patters and this time Kakashi truly wakes up. In the split moment between sleep and consciousness he wonders if Sakura had come home, but is met with disappointment when he notices that it is only the sound of rain. Kakashi thinks such is too common of an occurrence.

His feet touch the wooden boards one at a time, but he still stumbles from the lingering effects of the alcohol. Though he has no objective destination, Kakashi wanders into the kitchen to escape the confines of his bedroom. It is three in the morning, he notices, and relents to the fact that this will be yet another sleepless night for him.

But then he hears a knock.

And then another knock.

And then another.

Suddenly a string of knocks riddle his door, a hollow drum mimicking the poundings of his chest. His mind leaves but there is no bliss encompassing him this time. He slowly makes his way to the door, one foot in front of the other, shakily, slowly, until he is but a few inches from it.

Then the doorknob turns and in a split second he is out the door, dying to see the flurry of pink waiting before him. He does not want to wait even a second to hold his cherry blossom, lover, life partner, and wraps his needy arms around the small of her waist.

.

.

.

.

.

.

,

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

But when he opens his eyes it is not the pink he expects, a mixture of crimson, orange, and blue in its stead.

"I'm sorry."

FIN

* * *

A/N: DON'T KILL ME I DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO END THIS WAY! Also I know Kakashi usually uses ONE eye, but he rushed out of bed haha.

Anyway if it wasn't clear, she went off on a **mission** for those months with Naruto.

One last thought: I'm sorry for not marking it a tragedy. I figured it would be too obvious and would ruin the fun.


End file.
